Scooby-Don’t

This one started out great but lost its way, got pretty confused, and floundered around aimlessly to the inevitable happy conclusion. It’s a shame because the premise was a fresh one for Hallmark, the two lead actors were good and likable as were the characters they played, and in the beginning, there were several cute lines in the script. It opened with a spoof of Ghost Hunter-type reality shows with which I am very familiar because a lot of reasons. Ghost hunting is our couple Jana and Brian’s hobby and the movie opens with them doing just that. They really nailed the usual lingo and crazy machines that all respectable ghost hunters would not be without. It turns out that on this occasion Brian has lured Jana into a haunted insane asylum to propose marriage. It was cute. I really liked their relationship and that they were so enthusiastic about the unusual hobby that they shared in common. 6 months later they arrive at the (3-tombstone rated!) Keystone Manor, a haunted inn that they have chosen as their wedding venue. And this is about where it all starts to go downhill.

The house is haunted by the bougiely named Angelique DeMorney whose revolutionary war-hero true-love was ambushed and killed the day before their wedding. The anniversary of their planned elopement is coming up on Brian and Jana’s wedding day and Angelique is determined that there will be no wedding in her house unless it is hers to Malcolm, her dead lover. Jana and Brian decide to find out whether Malcolm is out there somewhere in ghost form (he is) and reunite them so they can cross over into the great beyond together forever. After “research” they find him at a pub which used to be the old jailhouse where he died of his wounds. It turns out that Malcolm was an ancestor of Brian and they look exactly alike. This familial connection is why Brian and Jana can interact with the two ghosts. New-to-Hallmark Dominic Sherwood was effective in the dual role, distinguishing the slightly goofy Brian from the serious and sad Shakespeare-quoting Malcolm very nicely.

Hardly anything in this movie made sense. For over 200 years Angelique has not been able to communicate with or be seen by anyone until the arrival of Jana and Brian. They are her one chance to finally be reunited with Malcolm and they vow to help her do so. They are ghost hunters. Brian is an ancestor of Malcolm. What could be more coincidentally fortuitous?  Yet Angelique is spiteful and hostile off and on (mostly on) throughout the movie. She sabotages their wedding preparations and plays mean tricks like turning their wine into vinegar. This ghost has powers outside the realm of the usual poltergeist activities. She whines all the damn time. She would have been well served if Jana and Brian left and had their wedding at “The Radisson (like normal people)”.

Brian calls in a disgraced TV medium recently exposed as a total fraud. (Why does he do that?) It is immediately apparent that he is a big phony and is rude to Jana and her more scientific approach to boot. Why don’t they throw him out on his ear immediately? But they put up with him until his stupid scheme literally blows up in their faces.

Why does Jana continually bring up her former fiance who left her at the altar years ago and often in Brian’s presence? She and Brian are a solid couple but Jana starts to doubt him for no reason. The conflict did not make sense in the context of their otherwise loving and fun relationship. Plus it was hurtful to Brian. Brian accuses her of trying to purposely sabotage their relationship and he’s probably right. It was meaningless manufactured drama and unnecessary.

And most importantly of all, why do they send their parents on a hayride when Jana’s father has debilitating allergies?

The script is full of overused trendy catchphrases like “We got this!”, I finally felt “seen”, and “I really get you”. Some of which come out of 200-year-old Angelique’s mouth. The one they thankfully forgot was “It’s complicated.” I usually ignore this stuff but I am up to here with these lazy word crutches. The whole thing, once the ghosts got involved, was more like a Scooby-Doo episode than the promising self-aware comedy-romance it started out to be. It’s almost like they changed writers mid-stream. I’m not saying they did, but the thought occurred to me.

Skipping through a lot of scenes, it all ends with a double wedding of the humans and the ghosts with the ghost couple going off together into the light. I strongly suspect that once Malcolm gets to know petulant and bitchy Angelique a little better they will be heading for Heavenly Divorce Court.