By Annabel Monaghan

**spoilers**

“I’ve never met you,” he says. I remember this exactly, because it’s a weird sentence structure. The idea was that the two of us had never met, yet the way he says it puts the focus on him. You never forget your first red flag.

When our desserts come, he wants to play his new favorite game, Romance Movie. “Okay, here’s one. Male talk-show host from Akron, Ohio.” I stab a bite of chocolate cake as I think. “He goes out to the country to interview a reclusive movie star and falls for her caregiver, who probably dreams of opening a cupcake shop.” “They all do.” “An inordinate number of bakers in these movies,” I agree. “And no one’s overweight.”

This was an excellent romantic comedy in terms of the writing, the likability of the characters, and the humor. Unfortunately what happened (the crisis and drama in the book and the why of it), which stemmed from the characters’ choices and decisions was kind of a deal breaker and brought a maybe 5-star book down to 4 stars.

Nora is a script writer for The Romance Channel. In her afterward, the author, Annabel Monaghan, confesses that she got addicted to The Hallmark Channel while she was recovering from surgery.

In two-hour increments, I dwelled in the hardware stores and bakeries of adorable small towns, watching romances unfold with subtly different storylines. The idea for Nora Goes Off Script started to bubble as I found myself unable to look away from the very specific female fantasy that these movies were selling….After about a week, I became preoccupied by the people who wrote these movies….This is where Nora Hamilton came from, my imagined writer for my imagined Romance Channel who has spent a decade supporting her horrible husband by writing these movies.

Our heroine is a single mother of 2 and after her divorce from her awful husband, used her marriage to this loser to write a considerably darker script which (Oh Happy Day) was sold to a major studio and is being made, as the book opens, into a major motion picture. Part of the movie will be filmed in her cherished private Tea House in her backyard where she does all of her writing. The movie in fact is called The Teahouse.

It’s as if Dr. Faircloth reached over the pond and plucked it out of the English countryside. I distinctly remember hearing Ben use the word “shed” when we walked into it, and I ignored him the way you do when you’re trying to stay married.

The Oscar-winning handsome superstar Leo who is playing the part of her husband is going through a bad patch in his personal life and is drawn to down-to-earth Nora, her kids, her home, and the small-town life she lives. When the movie wraps, he stays on and romance ensues. Leo’s fish-out-of-water experiences are endearing.

He wants to know what the bags are for, and I just shake my head. I scan my Stop n’ Save card to use the self-checkout gun, and his mind is blown. “So, it just knows what you’re buying?” He’s turning the gun in his hands, peering into the reader as if he’ll be able to see the tiny men who are making it work.

We are already endeared to Nora given the first-person narrative, her attitude toward everything, and her wry commentary on her life. Leo falls head over heels for the whole package and the feeling is mutual. When Leo has to leave for Hollywood unexpectedly for an important meeting it is a return to reality but Leo assures Nora and the kids he will be back. But he doesn’t come back. He ghosts them. What? Why? This is where the story goes off the rails. Since the story is told from Nora’s point of view, we are as in the dark as she is. My feeling was that I didn’t care what the reason was. Barring death, a coma, or amnesia, there was absolutely no excuse for Leo’s behavior. Nora and her children are heartbroken but are trying to move forward in the second half of the book.

The movie is nominated for several academy awards including best screenplay, and this was one of the several fun parts of the novel. Talk about a fairytale wish-fulfillment fantasy! Naturally, Leo and Nora meet and the truth comes out. Turns out it was all caused by a lie that Leo was told which he unquestionably believed. And there was no excuse for that. It was a little bit Nora’s fault for not being more persistent in trying to get a hold of Leo to find out what was wrong, but it was 95% Leo’s fault for being an idiot. What he believed about Nora was not only incredible but was an insult to her. And not only that, but he really didn’t take responsibility and even seemed to blame Nora and the liar at first.
The whole mess was smoothed over and a very happy ending followed. At least Nora and the kids thought so. I wasn’t so sure. I hope Leo grows up.

In addition to Nora and Leo, there are several other characters, particularly Nora’s family and friends and Leo’s P.A., Weezie, who are well drawn, lovable, and add to the enjoyment of the book. Another very well-drawn character is the ex-husband, Ben, who is disgusting, contemptible, and we hate him. But we never see him or meet him in person and that is a problem. So much time is spent telling about Ben, that I wanted him on the scene to experience Nora’s triumph personally and professionally. It would have been well within his character to have him show up and threaten to fight for custody of the kids or demand alimony. I would have loved to see him vanquished and beaten.
Near the end of the book, When everything is getting sorted out, Nora’s 11-year-old son Arthur confides,

“When Leo came, I thought how awesome it would be for Dad to show up and find Leo there instead. I liked to think of Dad driving up to our house and finding you and Leo on the porch, like all happy.”…I just liked the idea that he’d leave again knowing we didn’t want him.

Me too Dude, me too. And I might add, it would have been cool if Leo punched him in the nose in front of the whole town. And all kinds of stuff like that.

This unfulfilled potential of these imagined but nonexistent scenes, which honestly, I felt the reader had been set up for, dropped the book from 4 stars down to 3 star territory. But like I said, I loved the writing and would definitely try another book by this author. I’m adding half a star for the meatloaf recipe at the end.